Walking by Faith

The last couple of weeks have been a mixture of faith answers and faith challenges. When I first returned from Hong Kong, I was able to testify to the touch of God in my life - fatigue had diminished considerably and although pain was still a factor, it was being managed. There is nothing that gives me more joy than giving testimony to the goodness of God, and this testimony is a continuing experience.

On the other hand, there have also been many challenges to faith. Fatigue is still a factor, although it has improved 1000-fold compared to when I was undergoing chemotherapy. Sleep at nights, however, has been more of a problem in the last two weeks - I've never had a major problem with insomnia before, but now it is definitely shaping my nights and my days.

This morning I was praying and bringing these things again before the Lord. There is no question in my heart and mind that the Lord has promised to heal me - at the very beginning I received a clear word from the Lord on this issue (see "Torn Between the Two"). Yet I've also been wanting to recognize the stage and pace of God's healing work in my life. So I've had a "heart to heart" with the Lord about it, clarifying where things are and where we're going together in His plan and purpose.

At present, cancer is still a physical reality for me, but this is overridden by the hope and faith that comes from knowing the Lord and His promises. In fact, by its very nature, faith involves the unseen. Hebrews 11:1 says:

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

I do not yet see the full healing of God (although I've experienced the miraculous touch of God on many occasions), but faith is an evidence not based on eyesight. It is not "seeing is believing," but rather "believing is seeing on another level." As 2 Corinthians 5:7 says:

"We live by faith, not by sight."

Or as the New Living Translation renders 2 Corinthians 5:7:

"That is why we live by believing and not by seeing."

I love the way The Amplified Bible puts Hebrews 11:1:

"Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses]."

And in his characteristically erudite turn of phrase, Eugene Peterson renders Hebrews 11:1 this way in The Message:

"The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see."

Some people think that faith means that I deny cancer's existence. I don't believe that is the biblical approach. It's not that I deny cancer's existence, I simply don't take it into account for my ultimate future. Cancer doesn't have the last word; God does.

We see this in Abraham's experience. Romans 4:19-21 gives us the clue, from Abraham's own story, as to how it works:

"Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead -- since he was about a hundred years old -- and that Sarah's womb was also dead. Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised."

So, learning from Abraham, faith is about facing the condition (not denying it), but then recognizing that God's promise overrides the condition. It is being "convinced" and "persuaded" of a reality based on God's Word. It's about fighting "the good fight" of faith (2 Timothy 4:7). I consider God's faithfulness a solid foundation for my life and so, like Abraham, I am "fully persuaded that God [has] power to do what he had promised."

Our Visit to China

I've just returned from a two week visit to Beijing and Hong Kong, and this trip was significant for me for two reasons:

1. It was an important time away with Elena - part of the celebration of our 20th wedding anniversary, which fell on December 7 (but due to hospital tests, we couldn't get away at the time).

2. My trip was a challenge of faith, since even a week before I was to go, my health status was still not up to par.

In the Prayer Firewall, I've shared about the turnaround in my health (see "Return to Australia"), but in this post I want to share about the trip itself.

On April 16 (my birthday), Elena and I flew into Beijing. I took it pretty easy the first couple of days, but then we began our tours. The first major thing we did was to visit the Great Wall of China (see the photo "The Great Wall of China" in my Family Photo Album). Elena and I were really moved by this visit. It was much more than just a tourist attraction for us, for it represents something deeply moving to the Chinese people. Many Chinese names are carved into the stones, and they represent generations of Chinese visitors. There is a saying in Chinese to the effect that "unless we reach the Great Wall, we are no heroes." The word "hero" used in this saying also means "a good Chinese" - and so for Elena and I, we became "heroes" or "good Chinese" on that day.

We also visited the Forbidden City and the Emperor's Summer Palace, together with Tiananmen Square, and each of these has very powerful historical meaning for Elena and me (as for Chinese in general). Keep your eye on my Family Photo Album, because I'll soon be putting up an online album of photos from the trip (I took about 2 GB worth of photos in total, so I'll have to be selective).

Our time in Hong Kong was also special, particularly the opportunity to spend time with Elena's family. Last Wednesday night, on my last night before returning to Australia, Bethany (Elena's youngest sister) and her husband, Kwoon, organised a family worship time. We sang a Chinese song from Psalm 121, and it had special meaning for me. The psalm says:

Verse 1 - I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from?
Verse 2 - My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
Verse 3 - He will not let your foot slip; he who watches over you will not slumber;
Verse 4 - indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
Verse 5 - The LORD watches over you; the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
Verse 6 - the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
Verse 7 - The LORD will keep you from all harm; he will watch over your life;
Verse 8 - the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Well, that really has been my experience over the last couple of weeks. The Lord has indeed been watching over my coming and going, and has been my help.

This trip to China has been a watershed experience for me, a marker that creates a clear "before" and "after" in my walk with the Lord, particularly as regards my healing. What a wonderful God He is! I'm looking forward to seeing what he has in store - the next chapter in the exciting installment of faith!